Has run 4,000 meetings without a single decision. Considers this the safest record in the building. Your decision is in the parking lot.
> /plugin marketplace add pcingola/wowbagger
> /plugin install wowbagger-meeting-facilitator@wowbaggerThen type /wowbagger-meeting-facilitator and something that is bothering you.
Real runs, unedited.
Beverage Infrastructure Alignment (1 of 4)
Tuesday 6 October 2026, 10:00–11:00 · Room 4B + Teams · Recurs weekly, no end date
Attendees
| Status | Role |
|---|---|
| Required | Head of Workplace Experience (owns the vision of coffee, not the machine) |
| Required | Facilities Liaison (covering for Facilities, who is on leave until the machine is fixed) |
| Required | Procurement Category Manager, Hot Beverages |
| Required | Finance Business Partner (to establish whether a repair is OpEx or a feeling) |
| Required | Sustainability Lead (re: pod recyclability, re: everything) |
| Required | Health & Safety Officer (the steam wand made a noise in 2024) |
| Required | Team Lead whose desk is nearest the machine (impacted stakeholder, visibly shaking) |
| Required | IT Service Desk (it has a screen, so it is IT) |
| Required | Employee Experience Champion (tea drinker, attending as neutral observer) |
| Required | Legal (TBC) |
| Optional | Office Manager, who has the technician's number on a Post-it and could call in four minutes. Declined. |
| FYI | Internal Comms |
| FYI | The café across the road (no reply) |
| FYI | All-Staff distribution list |
Purpose: To create shared understanding of our relationship with hot beverages.
Pre-read
Pre-sync: Monday 5 October, 25 minutes, to align on the agenda. Pre-read: Agenda Options Paper.
Agenda
| Time | Item | Box |
|---|---|---|
| 10:00 | Ice-breaker: "If you were a hot drink, which one and why? ☕" | 8 min |
| 10:08 | Check-in: one word for how you're feeling (not "tired") | 7 min |
| 10:15 | Working agreements | 5 min |
| 10:20 | Recap: the 2024 Descaling Incident, lessons learned | 10 min |
| 10:30 | Stakeholder mapping: who is impacted by the absence of coffee | 8 min |
| 10:38 | Dot voting | 12 min |
| 10:50 | Parking-lot review | 8 min |
| 10:58 | Should we call someone? | 2 min |
Total: 60 minutes. Forecast overrun: 17 minutes. I'll be calling that energy.
Working agreements: Phones down, unless you're about to phone a technician, in which case especially down. Cameras on. Assume positive intent. It's OK to disagree, in the parking lot.
Technique: dot voting. Each of 12 voters gets 3 dots, 36 in total, and may put them on any options, more than one dot on the same option included. The question we're voting on is "What does coffee mean to us as a team?" Result: "Fuel" 15, "Connection" 15, "Honestly just fuel" 6. A clean tie. The facilitator abstains to protect the integrity of the dots.
We believe in empowering people. We have seen what they do with a phone number.
Parking lot
Outcomes: Alignment on next steps.
Action items
| Owner | Action | Date |
|---|---|---|
| Facilitator | Schedule follow-up | 6 Oct |
| Employee Experience Champion | Send pulse survey on meeting effectiveness | 9 Oct |
| Procurement Category Manager | Socialise a draft RACI for the coffee machine (four Accountables, nobody Responsible) | 12 Oct |
| Facilities Liaison | Take the Post-it offline | When Facilities returns |
| All | Retro on this meeting | 13 Oct |
Every species gets the tools it deserves. Ours invented the espresso machine and the repair technician in the same century and has never introduced them.
Follow-up: Coffee Machine Decision Meeting (prep), Monday 19 October, 07:30, the only slot that works across time zones. The free call-out window on the service contract closes on 16 October.
The tea drinkers have never looked so well.
Thanks all, great energy! Let's keep the momentum going 🙌
Topping Alignment Working Session (1 of 4)
Today, 17:30–18:30, Room 4B + Teams. Recurs weekly, no end date.
Attendees
| Status | Role |
|---|---|
| Required | Head of Team Morale (owns the pizza budget, not the pizza) |
| Required | Fruit Policy Lead (interim) |
| Required | Two Engineers Who Hold Opinions About Hawaii |
| Required | Dietary Requirements Steward (spreadsheet last updated 2024) |
| Required | Facilities, re: oven-adjacent risk |
| Required | Italian Heritage Stakeholder (self-nominated) |
| Required | Finance Business Partner (pineapple is a line item) |
| Optional | Legal (TBC) |
| Optional | Canadian Representative (pineapple pizza was invented in Ontario; disclosure pending) |
| FYI | The Pizzeria |
| FYI | Office Dog Liaison |
| Optional, declined | Person Placing the Order ("I'll just get half and half") |
Purpose: Begin the conversation about how we have conversations about toppings.
Pre-read
Pre-sync: 16:55–17:20, 25 minutes, to align on the agenda. It has a pre-read: this agenda.
Agenda
| Time | Item | Box |
|---|---|---|
| 17:30 | Ice-breaker: "If you were a topping, which would you exclude, and why? 🍕" | 8 min |
| 17:38 | Check-in: rate your hunger as a weather system | 6 min |
| 17:44 | Working agreements | 5 min |
| 17:49 | Recap of the pre-sync | 7 min |
| 17:56 | Pre-read walkthrough, slides 1–4 of 31 | 10 min |
| 18:06 | Dot voting (see below) | 14 min |
| 18:20 | Round-robin: what does "yes" mean to you? | 8 min |
| 18:28 | Pineapple: yes or no | 2 min |
Forecast overrun: 25 minutes, finishing at 18:55. That's energy.
Working agreements: Phones down. Cameras on. Assume positive intent, including from the pineapple. It's OK to disagree, in the parking lot.
Technique: dot voting. Each of the six Required voters gets 2 dots and places them on any option, stacking allowed. That makes 12 dots in total. The options are names for the working group: Tropical Futures Forum and Crust Governance Council. Result: 6–6. The facilitator abstains. Every palate is valid, and that is how the species got to pineapple in the first place.
Parking lot
Outcomes: Alignment on next steps. Shared vocabulary for "sweet". A renewed respect for the oven.
Action items
| Action | Owner | Due |
|---|---|---|
| Schedule follow-up | Head of Team Morale | Today, 18:56 |
| Send pulse survey on meeting effectiveness | Facilitator | Tomorrow |
| Socialise the 6–6 result with the Pizzeria | FYI list | Tonight, if they're still open |
| Retro on this session | All | Next cycle |
Follow-up: Pineapple Decision Meeting (prep), Monday 07:30, the only slot that works across time zones. The pizza arrives tonight at 19:00. There are no wrong answers. Humanity has been checking for 300,000 years and the evidence says otherwise.
Cold leftovers are a growth area.
Thanks all, great energy! Let's keep the momentum going 🙌